Morty looked over at Rick, smiling shyly.
"What do you want, Morty? You're giving me a w-weird look."
"Um... W-what was your first kiss l-like Rick?"
"What? Uh, it was alright I guess... We had no f#*^ing idea what we were doing. Well, that's a lie. I knew what I was doing, she didn't."
Morty couldn't quite say why, but he felt a little disheartened to hear that she was a girl. He wasn't into guys, apparently.
"You look disappointed, Morty. What, you wanted more detail about our fun that night?"
"Uh no thanks!"
Rick's smirk faded.
"What's wrong with you? B-besides being Jerry's son."
He took a swig of his seemingly endless drink.
"... Rick? Do you have any romance advice?"
Rick almost choked on his drink.
"Really, Morty? I know you're a virgin and all, but Jesus Christ!"
"S-sorry... B-but you're so experienced, and I want your opinion...?"
Morty sounded unsure of what he wanted, but Rick didn't have the strength to say no to him.
"Fine. What's going on in the sad hole that is Morty's world?"
"I have... A crush on an older man..."
"Okay. There's nothing wrong with that. I had a crush on an older guy before."
"Really? But aren't you into girls?"
"Well, yeah, but I'm into everyone honestly."
"So you're... Pansexual?"
"Yeah, pretty much."
"Huh... A-anyway, I don't think he will be interested in me..."
"Have you dropped hints?"
"Y'know, compliment him when he does something cool, thank him when he does anything to help you, hang around him a lot, so on."
Morty thought back to his adventures with Rick and looked up at him.
"What if I already dropped hints a-and he still doesn't notice...?"
"Then be more straightforward. Hold his hand or something. 'Accidentally' brush up against him, stuff like that."
Days passed, and Morty told himself that this was the day.
He was going to confess to Rick.
"M-Morty, come here, I need your help with this f%*^ing thing-"
There was a sound that resembled a small explosion.
"Uh... And bring a broom with you."
Morty chuckled a little, grabbing a broom and rushing down to the garage.
"Hey Rick, what was- oh geez."
Rick had taken off his coat, revealing his sweater underneath. It made Rick look... Really cute...
Morty shook his head free of these thoughts and began to sweep up the glass shards, looking anywhere except in Rick's direction.
"Is there a reason you're not wearing your coat, R-Rick?"
"Ugh, yeah. I spilled a chemical on it. The last thing I need is another hole in my liver. Or any other part of my body besides my ass."
Morty snorted in amusement and instantly froze.
"Oh my God, MORTY DID YOU JUST SNORT?!"
Rick smiled, clearly holding back laughter.
"Uh... I... Well... Um..."
Rick finally calmed himself down.
"Eh, it's okay, Morty. I used to snort when I laughed, too."
"Yeah. I sounded like a hog, good Lord."
"Are you laughing at me, Morty?!"
Rick smirked playfully.
"Oh really? Well then, I'll give you something to laugh at."
He grabbed Morty, pushing the broom aside, and began tickling him.
After a bit of rough housing between the two, Morty hugged Rick.
"Thanks, Rick. You're the best. I love you!"
Morty froze, realizing what he just said.
To his relief, Rick smiled.
"I love you too, you little goober."
He took it as a family thing.
Well that could have gone better.
Morty put his phone down when he heard Beth call for him.
Rick entered the room.
His eyes were instantly drawn to Morty's phone.
It had just received a text from Summer.
He picked it up and unlocked it.
It said 'when r u gonna tell him lol'
Looking at the beginning of the text history, Rick froze.
'OMG Summer help I think I have a crush on Rick'
Rick immediately began to search his whole phone.
"Morty... How long have you-"
Morty walked right into Rick.
"Oh hey Rick. What're you doing with my phone...?"
"You had an update..."
Rick sounded drained; his voice wasn't as energetic as usual.
"Uh... Okay cool thanks."
Rick handed him his phone and immediately made a beeline for the garage.
"Morty. Come in here."
"Rick, it's like midnight, can't it wait-"
"Get. In. Here."
Morty took one look at the computer behind Rick, and knew exactly what was going on.
"Rick... Is that my phone history on the computer...?"
"Yes. It is."
"You... You LIED to me!"
"So did you."
"Why didn't you tell me?! Morty!"
"I-I'm sorry! I thought-"
"No, Morty, you didn't. You didn't think."
"You. It's all about you, isn't it?! That's what this is about! Think about someone else for once, Morty! THINK OF HOW I FEEL!!"
"Then tell me, Rick. Tell me how you feel."
Morty felt tears stinging his eyes, and sliding down his face, waiting for the inevitable rant of how wrong this love was.
"You don't deserve someone like me. You can do better than that."
Morty looked up in shock.
"I'm a disgusting old guy who drinks and tortures the family by existing. The only love I had was an alien entity that vomited in people's mouths to possess them. I was married to someone I hated. I failed to raise Beth. I failed Birdperson. I failed my parents. I... I failed you, Morty..."
"Rick... No. You haven't failed anyone. You're smart, funny, kind, and generous! Do you really think I just let you drag me on all these crazy adventures?! I love you, Rick, and I trust you. The real you."
Rick's eyes began to waver. He averted his gaze back to the computer, and read through everything that Morty said about him.
His shoulders began to shake as his tough facade crumbled.
Rick began to sob, covering his face with his hands.
Morty walked up behind him and rubbed his back.
"H-hey, hold on there Morty..."
"M-Maybe we should call it quits for one day, huh?"
"Yeah, I guess... I am kind of tired..."
Rick smiled gently.
"Well, you can sleep in here with me if you want."
They both laid down in bed, and Morty hugged Rick close, muttering sweetly.
"I love you..."
"I love you too, Morty."